Chocolate – My Frienemy!!

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Chocolate…I love it!  I hate it!!

If it wasn’t for this one little morsel, I would be able to get through any day feeling positive about my diet and exercise now with my lap band.  I have had 1 fill of 3 cc’s in my band and have some restriction.  I can eat a normal 4-6 oz meal slowly and stay satisfied for a few hours.  I write down everything I eat making sure to track my protein and water intake.  I take my vitamins every day.  And, I have also started walking 30 minutes a day.  All the right things that the doctor listed to do.

Now, for the hiccup to a perfect report card…… Chocolate!

It seems to be worse during the week when I’m at work but it pops in my head at the craziest times.  I have tried adding a chocolate protein bar into my lunch when I pack it each day to counter this but it still happens that I end up at the vending machine for a milky way dark (only because I know the dark chocolate is supposed to be healthier) once in a while.  Then after enjoying that candy bar, I mentally start kicking myself!  Why you ask can I not control this urge?  Good question!

Today was one of those days.  I did everything right until 2:30 pm…Then the monster reared it’s ugly head!  I had my protein bar and it satisfied me for an hour or so but I still couldn’t stop thinking about that chocolate bar! Finally I caved and went and got one.  Then comes the guilt…Why could I not control this?

Now, I understand that I’m not supposed to beat myself up over this but it’s difficult not to!  I have to remind myself that the band was not implanted around my brain or my mouth but this seems to be more about head-hunger or afternoon drag cravings because I’m not hungry when I do this.

Starting tomorrow, I plan to re-focus my thoughts when this craving comes along.  I’m like an alcoholic when it comes to chocolate, so instead of trying to feed it a small portion, I am going to attempt to quit cold turkey!  I must listen to my body and only eat when hungry.  Address the reasons for the craving for chocolate… Feeling frustrated…Wish me luck!